Sunday, May 15, 2011

24 hours

I have spent the last 24 hours in a good mood. Well, I take that back. I was in quite the bitchy mood last night after my therapist told me she couldn't (more like wouldn't) talk to me for 24 hours. I almost took some pills (to get high). I opened the pill box and had a drink and everything. Then I decided it wasn't worth it. I just wanted to go to sleep. It took me almost two hours to go to sleep. Fucking pissed me off. Then I wake up at three in the morning and can't fall back asleep because my thoughts were racing about my therapist again. Grrrr. But I must say once I was up for the day (after 9 am), I started feeling better.  Actually, no, not quite that early. I was still upset. I told my grandparents I cut when I was telling them why I was in a bad mood. They weren't mad or anything so I guess that's good.
I cleaned my room..like dusted and vacuumed and all that lovely shizz.
Read two chapters for biology. Only one more to read. Final is Tuesday. 0.o
Worked a little bit on math. I actually remembered how to do some of the stuff. 0.o x 2493493579257979
My grandparents house is officially on the market. Did I tell you guys that I would be moving? Well, if not, you know now. We have to downsize. My grandparents can't afford the house payment anymore. It's sad because I just moved in and got unpacked just to have to pack up and move again. :( My grandparents have lived here for 13 years. I wish they didn't have to move. They wish so too.
I ate too much..as usual. My grandpa is buying me a hot fudge sundae. Just what I need. FAT ASS!!
My friend is still in the hospital.
My mom and sister are home from camping. My little sister fell in the lake. Classic. lol.
Ummm, I don't know what else to say.
Oh yes I do. I just want to say that I'm here for anyone who is struggling. I'm sorry that things have been so hard on people lately with deaths and self-harm. Makes me sad. I wish the world didn't rain on people who deserved the sun. I love you guys. Please stay safe.

Positives (it's been awhile since I've done these):
-I had yummy pancakes.
-I saw my mommy.
-I wasn't as stressed out today.
-I didn't OD last night.

4 words from my listeners:

Lissy said...

Well done for not OD'ing, I'm very proud of you chicky <3

Nikki said...

im glad you didnt OD. and see, you werent as stressed out today so its a good thing <3 hang in there girly :)

Tiffany Tilly said...

Yay for a better day, i'm so happy for you, i'm crying tears of joy literally. I hope things stay this way for a while and good luck on your finials in school! Plus good job on not OD'ing or anything harmful, that's really good and i'm proud of you.

SilentNightmare said...

Good Job on no OD'ing *hugs*

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