Totally Triggered

I was watching Law and Order: SVU tonight with my grandma. Seemingly no problem, right? Wrong. It was all going good until I see one of the detectives pass out. Seeing people pass out makes me feel funny. I don't know why. In a way I think it's because I'm jealous? I don't know if "jealous" is the right word but I don't know how else to describe it. When I see someone pass out, I wish it would be me. I have a strange obsession with passing out. I actually like to pass out even though I rarely do. I think I might be an attention whore. 0.o Anyways, there's more to the story. So it's the end of the show and I'm kinda getting the feeling of I know what's going to happen next. And what do you know, it does! The girl eats the poisonous mushrooms. She wakes up in a hospital bed after having her stomach pumped. She looked all around confused and scared. I know that feeling. I've been there before. She wanted to die and they saved her. It's the same story of my life. Well except for the fact that I don't eat poisonous 'shrooms to die. I just OD. Yeah, so I don't know. Just thought I'd share the fact that I am totally feeling suicidal at this time. Stupid triggers. It'll pass though once I peacefully go to sleep.